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Friday, February 25, 2011

Feeling smarter?


If you ever feel a little bit stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius.. 

(On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.) 
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? 
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever," 
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest. 
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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." 
--Mariah Carey 
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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," 
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign 
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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body," 
--Winston Bennett,  University of  Kentucky   basketball forward. 
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"Outside of the killings,  Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country," 
--Mayor Marion BarryWashington, DC
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"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it," 
--A Democratic congressional candidate in   Texas. 
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"Half this game is ninety percent mental." 
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark 
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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." 
--Al Gore, Former Vice President 
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"I love California   .. I practically grew up in Phoenix." 
-- Dan Quayle 
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"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?" 
--Lee Iacocca 
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"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." 
--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst. 
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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." 
-- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor. 
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"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." 
--Department of Social Services,  Greenville,  South Carolina 
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"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." 
--Keppel Enderbery 
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"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." 
--Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman

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Feeling smarter yet? 

Friday, February 11, 2011

Definitions!

There things in this world that people use (or should use but DO NOT) that I am going give my definition of:

Indicator(s):

  • Device or part of a car or moving object used (OR NOT) to signal the intention of the movement of the said moving object.
Cycling:
  • One of the simplest and most effective modes of transport known to mankind.
Cyclist:
  • Person who partakes in the above mention activity on a recreational basis
  • The said person is often hated for being on the road where cars and bigger moving objects are moving.
I have done a lot of cycling in my time (about 15 000 kms). True, its not a huge amount compared to some people but in those kms i have realized many things but there only 4 truths. They are:
  1. I am blessed to be able to get on a bike and ride in a beautiful country (South Africa). God has blessed me with the some of the most amazing views and experiences ever imagined whilst on the bike. Amen.
  2. There are only types of cyclists - ones that have not fallen off and those that will (I have only fallen off once - during the Tour Durban 2004 and BY ANOTHER CYCLIST trying to be a HERO)
  3. Indicators do exist but only as ornaments and not as useful objects to tell people where you are going next!
  4. Cyclists are motorists enemy number 1 on the road and (MOST) motorists believe that cyclists should never be one the road EVER in any shape or form whatsoever.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Life threatening

I am fortunate enough to be a cyclist and even more fortunate to be a cyclist that commutes to work. I have been cycling about 10 years. With studying part time and working full time - my cycling has died down to two or three fun rides a year with min training in between.

i left my article clerk career behind in November 2010 and joined a very nice company in Morningside, Durban. We use an old house as the office and my office has an en suite bathroom (very Lanie indeed). i asked my boss if i could cycle to work and he said sure thing!

Anyway, i cycle to work and back about 2 / 3 times a week in rain and shine. it is way less stressful than driving for me and takes around about the same amount of time!

On my return trip the other afternoon (bear in mind that Durban in February is light until about 7pm so it was still sunny) i was cycling past a shopping centre and this &^%$%& in a white VW Golf GTI with tinted windows decides to turn into the centre far too quickly whilst i was going across the entrance!! WTF! I was travelling at about 40 km/h and was lucky not to hit him. i did manage to swerve out the way - Thank God there were no cars following me! I also managed to swear at him to which he found it necessary to stop his car and return fire!
Seriously! i have never been more scared in all my life!

Having said all that - I am a cyclist but also a motorist too and i am not saying cyclists are perfect because they are not at all! I regularly swear at them for being stupid. ^$%&*#$%^ like this need to be hauled over the coals for reckless driving in my (clean) opinion.

Cheers,


Thursday, February 3, 2011

So here is my 2 cents worth!

Good morning world!


Welcome to my blog! 


I will be posting to the blog if and when some thing (good or bad) happens!


Until then - Cheers.